Porn Addiction

Today DH got a real good lesson involving his never-ending browsing of internet porn from our home computer.  And it hit him right in the wallet. Now I’m not such a prude about pornography.  As long as the content is not illegal, adults should be able to view such ‘scenery’ within the confines & privacy of their own homes. This past Saturday, just after I finally aroused the courage to create a blog account, I went to work for some OT.  When I got back I saw DH talking on the phone while using the PC.  I knew right away that something wasn’t right just by what he was saying over the phone, then my fears were confirmed when I saw the monitor.  Crashed.  Big time.  Our PC was diagnosed with serious infections of viruses & trojan horses– we couldn’t even log on to the net. Troubleshooting over the phone didn’t cut it–not even close. We had no choice but to fork over the cash to basically re-install everything, which was done by the Geek Squad. I’ve always warned DH about looking at that stuff on the net & I have complete faith that it was nothing criminal, otherwise he’d been calling me from the county jail today with the results.  All $310 dollars worth of it.  Anyway, it was worth it. This was the first crash we’ve ever had since we’ve purchased our PC, so we’ve been lucky compared to some. Oh & for those of you who are wondering, they really do drive those funny little black & white cars.

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5 Comments

  1. Posted December 18, 2008 at 6:09 pm | Permalink

    Hi MottsA – I am glad your computer is up and running again.

    I feel awful when ours is knocked out by a storm and wonder if it will work again because we don’t have the moey to replace it now.

    Regarding pornography…you are more tolerant than I ever would be. I am really easy going and am not clingy and he could do whatever he wants kind of girl… but I draw the line at porn. I’d be pissed if he was looking at it. I know he has when younger – guys do that… maybe not all.

    I think pornography is demeaning to women.

    I don’t like what the industry represents. they take a beautiful, wonderful, fun,sexy, rewarding, bonding sensual experience and just turn it trashy and as if it doesn’t have any significance other then to get off with as many people as you can.

    Now in all fairness…I have chosen to never see porn myself. Yes i have seen nude pics. And who wouldn’t admire the bodies, etc? I also am not at all a prude.

    I love sex and believe it is a God given gift that we are meant to enjoy. But I think it is wrong when it comes to the porn industry.

    Also…porn addiction can be a serious problem. No one sets out to become an addict and there is no magic number of views to see and then you’re an addict… but it can happen and that threshold is probably different for everyone. And you here stories where men started with this and then had to increase it to more and sometimes cross over into more violent things to get the reactions. In otherwords they become desensitized to what they are seeing and so need more for stimulation. I am sure that isn’t all men but ones that are predisposed in that direction.

    And like every addiction… I guess you need to know why, under what circumstance is the person doing their addictive activity. Is it just occasional fun or are they “needing” to do it. In other words… could they put the bottle down anytime they want… or does it beckon them back..even when they don’t want to?

    I hope I haven’t offended you MottsA. I have strong feelings about addiction or potential addictions.

    And admittedly…as a woman…I would feel threatened that my husband viewed those things. I would think…so I am not good enough?

    And I am all for learning new things and being adventurous and I think what ever goes on between to “consenting” adults is fine, but there are other ways to get the info.

    And last but not least…as a Christian (believe me I am not perfect), but the values in the faith also cause me to feel it is wrong. And I am not Puritanical..ha ha as you know from reading my blog. Although…sometimes I do feel guilty about what I put up. 🙂

    I hope I haven’t offended you and we all have different opinions.

    Also…and this is different… but I have openly questioned this in the past.

    I have wondered if the internet has caused men that would not normally have crossed the line into child pornography to do so…or was it in them anyway.

    My girl friend’s father was a pedophile and I experienced some of that as a young girl although nothing bad and (well it was because none of it shoul ever have happened) my clothes never came off and I never touched him. So perhaps I am sensitive to the creepy factor/side of where that can go and in those days…there were no computers. And that stuff is as old as human existence.

    Still…I wonder if some of these guys…because the public stigma of going into a porn shop or whatever… don’t get more involved because they are in the privacy of their own home.

    My son worked for a small computer company that was taking off. Had many accounts. Then it was publicized in the papers that their president was arrested on charges of child porn, seized his computer etc. One of the banks actually withdrew their account because they didn’t want to be associated with son’s company as did a few others. Fortunately, the other partners bought the guy out, saved the company and they are doing well today.

    Would it have happened if he didn’t have the internet to go to? I wonder.

    I am sorry for being so wordy. Obviously you happen to touch on an area that I have strong feelings about.

    I hope I wasn’t offensive.

    Delete this if you wish. 🙂

    And again… sex is wonderful… just don’t like the dark side of porn.

    • Posted December 19, 2008 at 10:49 pm | Permalink

      Nah–I wasn’t offended in the least. Mainly because I am well aware of the kind of porn he looks at so I know I have nothing to worry about. DH is just very open sexually, partly because he’s a child of the 60’s & 70’s, & partly because he was never taught that materials of porn are demeaning, even though that’s what they portray. I think some forms of porn can be healthy for a marriage or committed relationship. Neither of us like to watch anything freaky. We even discussed this issue openly with our PCP. As a Christian, well, let’s just say there’s certain acts that I will never engage in, even with DH. Y’know Spray, you & my DH have something in common; the gift of gab. I could read your stuff over & over you’re a great writer, IMO.

  2. Posted December 18, 2008 at 6:15 pm | Permalink

    Hope you don’t mind but I blogrolled you. 🙂

    • Posted December 19, 2008 at 10:50 pm | Permalink

      Don’t mind a bit— I need all the help I can get. Time to write a few more posts. I’ve got some GOOD ones!

  3. Posted December 20, 2008 at 12:48 am | Permalink

    yeah there’s one thing that I told my husband early on “Ain’t NEVER happening!” LOL! he didn’t ask but I let him know what my grossometer registers. 😉 Other than that and some others… have fun!!

    Thanks for your kind words. 🙂

    I have heard it said that people prefer the short posts. I guess like medfriendly said when he introduced my guest post…he referred to me as a prolific writer but encouraged them to read because it was interesting…I forget exactly. 🙂

    I wonder how many I lose.

    I usually write more inane and funny things (says me) but you know all that has been going on and so I also blog fro catharsis as much as fun and well the blog has had a more serious tone this fall and I can see from my technorati that I lost 14 readers! Oh well. I picked up one.

    I never thought I’d care about stats but they are interesting and I love seeing repeat readers. You can’t always tell because isps change but some you can.

    I wish more people commented though.


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